Susan Kean

Letter, Susan Livingston to John Kean, January 13, 1788   

Galleries at Kean University · SUSAN KEAN TO JOHN KEAN

Kean Galleries and Collections, Liberty Hall Collection   

Audio Credits:   

Reader: Kaitlyn Lunardi  

Audio Director: Christopher Mallari, Audio Engineer, Kean University  

I have for some time, my dear husband, wished to write on a subject I thought of the utmost importance – but how to begin was the task. My dear sister Eliza has set one the example & I can not I think do better than by adopting her words, in the last letter she ever wrote her dear Lewis, and which he transcribed in a letter he wrote me a few days   
since:  

“The period of my approaching destitution appears to me probably at hand, in unmixed submission to the will of Providence is what I most ardently define. Yet, such is our human weakness that none I believe can await the awful hour without a pang. If even then the miserable cannot quit this earthly abode without a struggle, how much more lively must be the regret of those blessed with tender connections and enjoying all the facets of domestic felicity? To be conscious of rending with sorrow the bosom we would with to soothe, and to leave to unknown fate the tenderest pledge of mutual affection are considerations which might oppress even fortitude itself, and which a tender mind will find it difficult to struggle with. But when we force the probability of misfortune, I conceive it a duty to lessen the effects as much as possible by endeavoring to find a remedy. And I believe it must always be a satisfaction to surviving friends to know they fulfilled the wishes of those who are forever enabled to express their desires. From this supposition, I am induced to write at present confidant if there is nothing material to prevent it. My dear husband will endeavour to act in conformance to my opinion.”   

Thus far the dear Eliza wrote to her afflicted partner, and she proceeds with instructions respecting the educating of her daughter which, perhaps if I had seen, would have been exactly those I should have chosen for mine – if I had one. But it is my opinion, and your wish, that our infant is a male. If so, you certainly are the most proper person to instill into the young mind the principles of religion and morality. But it will be some year before it will be capable of receiving your instructions. It’s years of infancy – perhaps it would be best it spend with my dear aged father. He is particularly fond of very young children, and this may serve to amuse his dull moments, and cause him constantly to think of the man who had made his Susan happy, to you and Mr. Otto, he can never too grateful. I cannot presume to advise you not to marry, nor ever to point out a woman for your future companion. But let me entreat that you will not be precipitate in your choice. The temper of the person is of the greatest importance to your happiness. We already know that we can be happy without wealth, but not without consulting each other’s wishes in the most trivial affairs. Your Susan, since she has had the blessing of being nearly allied to you has ever made it her study, and a most charming one it has been. But every woman does not view it in the same point of light. I already know there are many things necessary to your peace of mind which even but a woman greatly attached to you might consider as sacrifices. But to one whose whole heart is solely yours, they are, rather, gratifications. Your reputation as a kind, affectionate husband none will dare dispute. This is so valuable a thing that every woman must advise you for it, and when time has in some measure made you forget your Susan, who adores you, may her place be supplied one who is more worthy, and who will make a kind mother to any poor orphan, if it is ever entrusted to her care.   

I have little to bestow, but that little – if my child should prove a female – I wish her to enjoy. May she be taught to consider Eliza Julia Otto, particularly, as her  sister and her friend. To a boy, my wearing apparel will be of little importance. Therefore, I request it may be given to my sister, perhaps my niece may be in greater want, and you may think it proper they should have a remembrance. This the prudence of my dear husband will be best able to judge of. May the Almighty enable me to bear the approaching hour with becoming magnanimity and reward the partner of my happiness with every blessing here and hereafter. Your attention will render my making use of Mr. Rutherford’s bond unnecessary. Therefore, my love, I will enclose that and your certificate. You will, I trust, find that I have been as prudent and economical as circumstance would permit. I can never be sufficiently grateful to Mr. and Mrs. Ricketts. My kind sister has already offered to be a mother if our infant should want one. I think you will never forget to consider them as your relations. They speak of you with great affection.   

Susan Livingston Kean  

January 13, 1788  

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